I dont like the way i look and the way people say things about me i wish i could just live together with you but its clear that i'm only hurting everyone around me 

i guess its true what i said 6 or 7 years ago in that plane ride i will get whatever i want and i'll never be happy and be fuliflled because you are not allowed to be happy i said to myself, if i was not such a coward and still have anything left i'd prefer to just kill myself